If you’re a mom wondering, Why do I feel so off lately?… you are not alone.

Many women come to me saying things like:

• “My heart races out of nowhere.”
• “I feel edgy all day.”
• “I can’t shut my brain off.”
• “I feel like I’m failing at simple things.”
• “Sometimes I think something is seriously wrong with me.”

As a therapist—and as a mom of two myself—I want you to know this: sometimes what you’re feeling isn’t weakness, failure, or “being dramatic.” It may be stress overload, anxiety, or panic.

These experiences can feel similar, especially in pregnancy and motherhood when your body, hormones, responsibilities, and emotions are already carrying so much.

Let’s talk through it like friends chatting over coffee.

First, You’re Not Crazy and You’re Not Broken

Women are often holding more than anyone realizes:

• the mental load of schedules, meals, appointments, school forms
• worry about pregnancy or your baby
• financial pressure
• relationship strain
• sleep deprivation
• caring for children while neglecting yourself
• fear about a child’s medical condition or development
• trying to be “grateful” while silently drowning

That kind of load affects the mind and the body.

Your nervous system responds to pressure. Your body speaks up.

What Is Stress?

Stress is your body’s response to demands and pressure.

Sometimes stress is short-term and manageable. Sometimes it becomes chronic.

Common Signs of Stress Overload:

• feeling irritable or snappy
• tension in neck, jaw, shoulders
• headaches
• trouble sleeping
• forgetfulness
• emotional exhaustion
• feeling touched out or overstimulated
• needing everyone to stop talking immediately
• crying more easily

Mom Example:

You’ve been juggling laundry, appointments, dinner, a sick child, texts from school, and no real break for days. By 5:30pm someone spills juice and suddenly you want to cry or explode!

That doesn’t mean you’re failing.

It may mean your nervous system has hit capacity.

What Is Anxiety?

Anxiety is often future-focused fear. It can feel like constant “what if?” thinking.

Your mind tries to protect you by scanning for danger—but it can become exhausting. And this includes physical danger (e.g. yikes, that car almost hit us!) and emotional danger (e.g. the school nurse thinks I'm a horrible mom!).

Common Signs of Anxiety:

• racing thoughts
• overthinking decisions
• trouble relaxing
• irritability
• restlessness
• trouble sleeping because your brain won’t stop
• constant checking or reassurance seeking
• feeling on edge
• muscle tension
• stomach discomfort

Mom Example:

Your child coughs once at night and suddenly you’re googling symptoms for an hour.

Or during pregnancy you notice one sensation and immediately fear something is wrong.

That’s anxiety trying to protect you by overestimating danger.

What Is Panic?

Panic often comes suddenly and intensely. It can feel terrifying.

Many women tell me they thought they were dying, fainting, or losing control. For me, I feel like an elephant has stepped on my chest! Check out my video How Long Does a Panic Attack Last?

Panic attacks are intense surges of fear accompanied by strong body sensations.

Common Signs of Panic:

• pounding heart
• chest tightness
• shortness of breath
• dizziness
• tingling
• sweating
• shaking
• nausea
• feeling detached or unreal
• fear of passing out
• fear something terrible is happening

Mom Example:

You’re in the store, walking around, thinking normally, then suddenly your heart pounds, your hands tingle, heat goes up the back of your neck, and you think, Something is very wrong.

That may be panic—not danger.

It feels real because the body response is real.

A Flood of Body Sensations

Your body is full of messages - but what do they mean?

When your nervous system senses threat (real or perceived), it activates survival mode. Our caveman instincts tell us that there is danger - they experienced more physical danger, whereas nowadays, we experience daily emotional danger.

That can create:

• faster heartbeat to prepare action (i.e. ready to Fight or Flight/flee)
• shallow breathing
• muscle tension
• sweating
• dizziness from overbreathing
• upset stomach because digestion slows
• shakiness from adrenaline

Your body is trying to protect you, so the Adrenaline pumps giving you the energy and focus you need in a crisis. But are you truly in a crisis?

It just may be sounding the alarm too often or even falsely, when we irrationally believe there is danger but there was not!

What to Do in the Moment

If It’s Stress Overload:



Pause and reduce input.

Ask:

• What can wait?
• What can be dropped today?
• What is one thing I need right now?

Try:

• step outside for 3 minutes
• drink cold water
• soften and unclench your jaw & shoulders
• ask for help
• lower expectations for tonight

If It’s Anxiety:



Ground your mind in the present.

Try:

• Name 3 colors of items around you right now
• Take slower exhales than inhales
• Ask: What facts do I know right now?
• Remind yourself: This is worry, not certainty.

If It’s Panic:



Let the wave pass without fighting it.

Try:

• Breathe out longer than you breathe in
• Put feet firmly on floor
• Name objects in the room
• Say: This is panic. It is uncomfortable but not dangerous.
• Let sensations rise and fall

Panic peaks and passes. I'll write more about provoked vs unprovoked panic. Check out this video I made about the 2 types of panic: LINK

You do not need to “win” against it. You need to ride it safely.

A Truth I Learned as a Mom

Sometimes I thought I needed more discipline, more patience, or to “get it together.”

What I actually needed was:

• rest
• support
• nervous system calming
• positive thoughts
• space to process stress

Many moms blame themselves for symptoms that are actually stress responses.

That self-criticism only adds more pressure! Ugh!

When Counseling Helps

Counseling can be incredibly helpful when:

• worry feels constant
• panic attacks are happening
• stress makes you reactive or exhausted
• you avoid things because of fear
• pregnancy feels emotionally overwhelming
• postpartum emotions feel intense
• you carry trauma from medical experiences or birth complications
• you feel unlike yourself

In counseling, I help women understand:

• thoughts
• emotions
• body sensations
• triggers
• nervous system patterns
• practical tools for tranquility

I take a holistic and personal approach—because no two mothers carry stress the same way.

A Gentle Reminder for You Today

You are not “too sensitive.”

You are not weak because your body is responding.

You are not failing because motherhood feels heavy.

Sometimes the most healing thing is learning what you’re actually feeling—and responding with compassion instead of criticism.

Need Support?

If anxiety, panic, or chronic stress has been weighing on you during pregnancy or motherhood, counseling can help you feel steady, supported, and like yourself again. I offer a free 15-minute counseling consultation so I can hear more about what you are experiencing and how I can support you.

You don’t have to carry it all alone.

Kathryn D. Gardner, LMHC, LCPC, PMH-C, CHC

Licensed Therapist in IL and FL

Certified Health Coach

Mom and Wife

Christian Catholic

New Tampa, FL

Kathryn Gardner, a licensed therapist for 25 years, specializes in a holistic approach to anxiety and stress management for women, especially in pregnancy and motherhood. She has an office in New Tampa, FL, and also sees women across FL and IL. Call or email today to set-up a free 15-minute consultation. You can feel relief and find your tranquility! today. www.FindYourTranquility.com

Find Your Tranquility shares information, not to replace medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Please speak with your provider to learn more about your health and wellness. 

Blog posts may utilize openAI tools (2026).